It may never happen...

I was watching some excerpts of one of Ross Kemp's programmes on Sky One the other day. I can't remember what the series is called, but it must be something like "Ross Kemp Visits Some Real Shit Holes", because the abject poverty and desperate tales of abuse and destitution were genuinely distressing and very moving. It's so easy to forget that even in present day Britain or the US, there are people whose lives are based around survival in the most squalid conditions.

In one scene, Kemp visited a man living in an abandoned, hurricane damaged house in New Orleans. Was it living in conditions, that even the least fussy rat would object to, that had lead to him suffering from what were clearly severe mental health problems? Or was it this very illness that had lead him there in the first place? Probably a combination of the two, creating a very viscous circle.

Thankfully, as often seems to be the way even in the most desperate of conditions, a group of volunteers tended to this unfortunate chap and the many others like him. It was genuinely humbling to see the essence of human spirit that deep down, cares for those less fortunate than ourselves, in action. For every Mark Bridger, there are many many more decent people who are actively supporting various good causes and it does my heart good to remember this.

Kemp spoke with one of these outreach workers and described that among the many other dreadful things that people like the mentally ill chap had to endure, was living an existence that was not even as good as 'day-to-day' but more like 'second-to-second'.

Now, I know exactly what he meant by this and it's true that a situation devoid of hope like this one, is impossible for most of us to imagine. But the phrase 'living day-to-day' and it's even uglier cousin, 'second-by-second', reminded me of the times that people have said that to me as they've sympathised with a predicament that I've been in - usually the pain caused by chronic ill health.

But in actual fact, illness and all the other various mental and emotional pains we humans get to experience during a typical lifetime, have given me plenty alongside the bits they've apparently taken away. One of the greatest gifts is actually the very thing which most people use to label unfortunate people in an undesirable situation, and that is 'living moment by moment'.

Far from being some kind of affliction, it has actually brought the greatest freedom imaginable. My experience has been that releasing my aspirations to achieve certain goals in the future that would yield happiness once achieved, and instead focusing my attention on what's happening right here, right now, has revealed a really quite magical world where happiness and many other positive emotions bubble up to be enjoyed immediately.

I'm not saying it's all a wonderful rose garden. Sometimes sitting quietly whilst taking notice of what's here is extremely unpleasant. But by giving it our full attention, you do get to see it for what it is. Somehow this lessens it's power and I have found this to be genuinely healing.

It's not always easy to keep focused on the present moment. Our minds appear to be predestined to try and run off and imagine various possibilities and fantasies that are anywhere but right here. We live in a culture where this is seen as normal and often encouraged - especially through aspirational marketing that is so prevalent.

At one time, this may have been part of a survival mechanism in order to help cut off the myriad of possible dangers faced by early man, before they happened.

And even now, it's nice to let your mind go and play with various concepts and have fun in an imaginary world. But when it does this of its own accord, all of the time, and dwells on worries and possible calamities, it ain't half wearing. I have found that being able to choose to spend a little while back 'here' is amazingly nourishing and therapeutic.

I had found myself scrabbling towards this conclusion myself, when, towards the end of the nineties, the Universe gave me a big old helping shove in the right direction.

I was in a bookshop when suddenly, a book actually appeared to come off the shelf and float in front of me! I think this was actually because of my eye moving rapidly from one place to another in quick succession rather than anything more mystical, but it got my attention nonetheless.

The book was called The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle (for Londoners, you may know it as 'The Pah of Nah'). The title was a little bit off putting to start with. Usually a book in the self-help section with the word 'Power' in it suggests how you can harness something to achieve your own goals; to basically get your own way. But I still felt drawn to it and in actual fact, you couldn't find a book less centred on letting the ego try to run your world.

It's focus is on just observing what's happening, right now, in a non-judgemental way. It's about accepting what's happening as it is. For me, it was such a relief to find someone with a point of view that was similar to my own - I was fed up and worn out trying to get the world to fit in with the way I wanted things to be.

I must have bought about two dozen copies for friends and family over the years. Whatever your situation, these are just some guiding words to encourage you to take notice of what's happening right now. You don't have to buy into any belief system. In fact belief, or faith are completely irrelevant here. It's all about your own practical experience, right now. Don't rely on what anyone else tells you is good or bad or any other judgemental label, just be aware of what you're doing, of what's going on.

I like how right now, I am typing these words on my iPad on a Sunday afternoon. And yet also right now, you are reading these words, whenever that may be. It could be days, weeks or years in between these two events in our conventional understanding of time. But ultimately, they both happen right now. Everything happens right now. There is nothing other than right now. You can imagine your next holiday, or you can relive the one you had last year, but what's really happening is that you're sat there, accessing various parts of your brain in the present moment.

Despite our very best efforts, we can never escape now. So spend a while focusing on what's here and let it be.

If any of this resonates with you, why not check out the book for yourself? (available here on Amazon for example)

There are many other helpful guides like this, but I have found it to be the best introduction to, what for many of us, is a very different way of looking at things.

There is also a 'lite' version called Practising The Power Of Now which strips down the essence of the original book into more digestible bite-sized pieces for those who prefer it that way.

These books are also available on Kindle and iBooks etc.

Whether you're blissfully happy, or going through some kind of turmoil, I really hope that these, or the philosophy they contain, help reveal a new dimension within your own life, like I found they did in mine.